First Christmas

Rating: PG
Category: AU
Pairing(s): Cid/Vincent, Cloud/Reno.
Warnings: None
Summary: It’s their first Christmas together, and Cid intends to enjoy it… if only he can find Vincent.
Notes: Merry Christmas, peoples!! This is the first of two Yuletide fics! A special gift to all the loving wonderful people who sent me cards and gifts, and who daily give me joy in my heart. Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays, and Blessed Be, everyone. May the coming year return to you the joy you give threefold.

Picture by Animama

“Hello?”

“Cid my man!”

“Barret! How the hell are ya?” Cid asked, holding the phone in his right hand as he sorted through a box with the other. Outside the small kitchen window, white flakes of snow ambled down from a pearl grey sky.

“Great! Just checking to see how life is going with you and Vincent.”

“Terrific,” said Cid, finding a canister of tea and setting it aside before continuing to rummage. “Now if I could just find the little shit.”

“Did he take off on you?”

“No, no,” said Cid. “Nothing like that. I just can’t find him. I’m sure he’s in the house, I just don’t know where.”

Barret was silent, trying to take all this in. Finally he cleared his throat.

“Cid… I’ve seen your house. It is a box divided in half. One side is the bedroom, one side is the kitchen and living area. The bathroom is in a funny little shed out back. How the hell could you lose Vincent in that?”

“I dunno.” Cid found the tea pot he had been seeking and set about making tea. “I brought him in last night, and he was acting really hinky and nervous, you know, being typical Vincent. He walked into the kitchen and started acting like a kitten in a new place. You know what kittens do, they stand there looking worried, then they wander around crying, then they vanish under something and you don’t know where they are until the digging wakes you up at four in the morning because they’re trying to bury the crap they just laid in your boot.”

“He’s not crapping in your boots is he?”

Cid laughed. “Hope not.”

Barret sighed. “That’s a real piece of work you hooked up with, Cid.”

Cid grinned. “Yeah I know, he’s cute.”

“He’s strange in the head.”

“Yeah, yeah. Just answer me one question. If you were a kitten in a new house where would you hide?”

“What kind of question is that?!”

“Just give me your best guess.”

“Either the closet or the attic. Does that place have an attic?”

“It has a crawlspace in the ceiling.”

“Well that’s probably where he is.”

Cid and Barret chatted for a while longer, then Cid hung up and finished unpacking his few belongings in the tiny yellow house in Costa del Sol, just across the street from Cloud’s little villa. He started some dinner, making a stew to simmer on the stove, then went on a Vincent hunt.

“Kitty kitty kitty?” Cid peered under the bed. “No kitty here. Is there a kitty in the closet?” He rose from the floor and walked across the box-cluttered little room to the sole closet, opening the door and peering in. “Kitty? No kitty here either.” Cid sighed, closing the door. “Gotta be in the attic crawlspace.”

Cid grabbed a chair and brought it over to the hatch in the ceiling, placing on the floor beneath the opening and standing on it. He pushed the hatch open, then hoisted himself up to peer inside. The crawlspace was dark and dusty, smelling of mice and disuse, dotted with a few cardboard boxes left behind by the previous owner. Huddled at the far back of the crawlspace, in amidst the boxes like the proverbial new kitten, was Vincent, his red eyes burning in the dim light like coals.

“Vincent I hate to be the one to point this out to you,” said Cid as he squiggled into the crawlspace that was only just large enough to permit him to enter. “But you’ve gotten a little strange over the years in that coffin.”

Vincent just watched him, red eyes blinking, as Cid managed to get all the way into the crawlspace. There wasn’t enough room to sit up so he had to lie on his stomach. Vincent simply huddled amidst the boxes, saying nothing.

“Vincent,” said Cid, “what’s the matter, babe?”

Vincent did not speak. He was clearly frightened and upset, though Cid was not entirely certain why, and emotional therapy was absolutely not his forté.

“Vincent? Are you going to come down or do I have to call the guys who trapped the raccoon I had in my attic?”

“I’m just… a little shaken up,” said Vincent quietly.

“Too much change and too fast,” said Cid.

Vincent nodded.

“Do you want me to just leave you be for a while? Let you work it out?”

Vincent nodded again.

“Okay,” said Cid softly. “When you’re ready, just come on down.”

Cid squiggled out of the crawlspace, dropping down from the ceiling to the chair beneath, pulling the hatch closed.

“Great,” he muttered. “I am officially having my first high-maintenance relationship.” He walked over to the wall-mounted phone and called Barret. “Found him.”

“Where was he?” asked Barret.

“He’s hiding in the attic crawlspace, being a raccoon.”

“It’s not too late to run screaming, Highwind,” said Barret.

“Bullshit, it was too late to escape three seconds after I saw him. Pray for me, Barret, I’m in love.”

Barret just sighed. “You poor bastard. Well, better you than me.”

“Get bent. Talk to you later.”

“Later, Highwind.”

Cid hung up, then finished arranging their few belongings in the tiny house, taking the last of the cardboard boxes out to the recycle bin, watching the falling snow. That was a very rare event in Costa del Sol, and Cid hoped it stayed the few days until Christmas. He returned to the house, stepping inside and shutting the door. He decided to wait until dinner was done and see if that would lure any critters out of the attic.

“Hey Vin! What’s in those boxes up there?”

Cid heard some movement, then the sound of a box being opened.

“Christmas ornaments.” Pause. “That’s depressing.”

Cid rolled his eyes and muttered quietly; “I’ve seen you get depressed over rust in your mary-janes.”

There was more scuffing and scraping, and Vincent opened a second box. “More Christmas ornaments,” he said morosely. There came the sound of rummaging. “And a little photo album with pictures of little children putting the ornaments on a little tree in this little house.” Pause. “I think I want to slit my wrists.”

“That’s it. Come on, Mr. Raccoon, out of the attic. If you’re gonna kill yourself then you can’t do it there. Nothing worse than a dead undead gunslinger in the walls.”

“But…”

“Vincent this house is over a hundred years old. It was here before Costa del Sol was. Those babies are all grown up with babies and grandbabies of their own.”

“But…”

“I’m going out to get us a little Christmas tree. I’ll be back in a bit.”

Cid left, walking out into the Costa del Sol evening, enjoying the soft snowfall. He found a tree at a nursery; a type of small pine that grew locally. He normally would have just cut one down, but Vincent was already a nervous wreck. He couldn’t imagine what Vincent would do if he hauled home a dead tree. This would be their first Christmas as a couple, and he wanted it to be just perfect. And it would be if he could get his boyfriend calmed down. But Vincent had been a mess since Cid had bought the house, and no matter what he did he couldn’t seem to make him comfortable.

“I always swore I would never have a high-maintenance relationship,” he growled, dragging the little tree into the unspeakably tiny house. He managed to get it into the kitchen, then looked around. “Valentine are you still in the ceiling?”

No answer. Cid growled. “I’m in my happy place. I’m in my happy place. I’m in my happy place…”

He found a place for the tree and set it up, then went into the kitchen to make eggnog.

“I’m making eggnog,” he called up to the ceiling. “It’s really tasty…”

Nothing. Cid sighed.

“I got a turkey for Christmas. I’m gonna make sunflower and mushroom stuffing…”

There was a faint creak in the attic. Cid grinned.

“And I’m gonna roast chestnuts…”

A quiet scuff, then the soft whisper of the ceiling hatch opening.

“And I’ve got mince pies…”

The hatch shut and there was the sound of a lock being flicked into place. Cid gave the ceiling a look of annoyance as Vincent retreated to his place behind the boxes.

“Dammit, Valentine! Don’t make me come up there!”

No response. Cid picked up the phone and called Tifa.

“Tifa? Cid. My boyfriend is bugshit, and I thought since you liked Cloud for so long and he’s bugshit too you could give me some advice.”

Tifa sighed quietly. “Cloud is not bugshit. What’s Vincent doing?”

“Hiding in the attic. I threatened him with a mince pie.”

“Monster! Come threaten me with a mince pie.”

“Tell ya what, I’ll threaten you with a mince pie if you threaten me with a pumpkin one.”

“Deal,” said Tifa. “Why is Vincent hiding in the attic?”

“I dunno, feeling overwhelmed I guess. I just want him to come down!”

“Cid, he’ll come down when he’s ready. He’s an emotional disaster, he’s been a train wreck for as long as we have known him. He’s scared. Probably terrified. He’s had some horrific things done to him, and now he’s in a new place with a new boyfriend in a new relationship… and the same old baggage. Just try to be patient.”

“I’m not good at patient.”

“I’ve noticed. But try anyway.”

“Screw that, I’ll just go up with a hose.”

“Cid…”

“I’ll use warm water.”

“Just be gentle with him, we still have no real idea what his story is.”

Cid had no intention of hurting or upsetting Vincent, he just wanted him out of the attic. And being gentle and patient was not his strong point… which of course Vincent would know. He was probably scared to death. There was no denying Vincent was strange, but dammit the guy had earned it. All he wanted was a little time to adjust. So Cid decided just to leave him alone for now and let him adjust.

He finished unpacking, then made dinner as well as eggnog. Not that Vincent would touch anything with raw egg in it, but hey, who knows, maybe he would go for it. Cid would have liked to have decorated the tree, but… well… the only ornaments they had were in the attic with a nervy little vampire. Cid sighed heavily and tried to convince himself to be patient, but… well… it was not easy. He ate dinner alone, had a few glasses of eggnog while reading a technical manual, then went to bed. Alone.

***---***

Vincent did not come out the next day. Nor did he come out the day after. The snow piled up, the temperature dropped, but Vincent was not to be seen, and Cid was becoming genuinely worried. Finally he put on his coat and boots and walked down to the drop-in clinic. He had questions, and he didn’t know where else to take them. He waited two hours to see a doctor, and was finally led into a room where a slightly harried-looking man was sitting behind a large desk cluttered with forms and various medical paraphernalia. He was busily filling out a form.

“And what can I do for you today Mr. Highwind?” the man asked as Cid sat down.

“I can’t get my boyfriend to come out of the attic,” said Cid.

The doctor stopped writing and looked up. “I beg your pardon?”

“I can’t get my boyfriend to come out of the attic,” repeated Cid.

“I see. Well.” He sat back in his chair and tossed his pen onto the desk. “Don’t… you people… usually come out of the closet?”

“I’m serious. He’s having some sort of emotional issues, he’s been up there for three days. I’m worried.”

“What has he had to eat or drink?”

“Nothing,” said Cid.

“The doctor raised an eyebrow. “Nothing? Are you sure he’s alive?”

“No of course he’s not alive. I think that’s part of his problem.”

The doctor stared at him for a long moment, then said “I would like you to leave now please.”

Cid rolled his eyes. “It was a Shinra experiment, he’s been physically altered to…”

“Leave. Now. I don’t have time for this.”

“He’s been genetically altered you dumbass!”

“Into what?”

“I don’t know! He doesn’t need to eat or drink if he doesn’t want to but he is alive in some way and I’m worried about him! I came here for help, are you going to help me or not?”

“No. Now leave. I don’t have time for sick practical jokes.”

“It’s not a…”

“I’m calling security.”

Cid left, angry and frustrated, striding through the snow back to the little yellow house, a knot of worry in his stomach that did not match the festive lights around the little town, and the gaily decorated shop windows. He jogged down the short flight of stairs that led to the little walkway of his home, reaching the wooden door and slamming it open. The house inside was dark and silent, the little tree still undecorated. Cid pulled the door shut then dragged the stool over to the hatch in the ceiling. Cid took off his jacket and tossed it aside, then climbed onto the stool, popping the hatch open and climbing inside.

“Vincent we have to…” Cid froze, and looked around. The cardboard boxes were opened, and some of the contents taken out. But that was all he saw. Vincent was gone. The stress of the situation was too much. Cid could only assume that Vincent had fled back to Shinra Manor, to hide once more where he felt safe.

“Ah shit,” he said softly, feeling his heart break. “Ah jeeze, Vincent, why did you have to take off? What did I do wrong? Were you just not happy? Was all this a mistake?” He felt tears begin to burn at his eyes. “Why didn’t you just come talk to me?”

The wind blew, making an empty, mournful sound. Slowly Cid climbed down from the crawlspace, pulling the panel back into place. He stepped down from the stool, and looked around, suddenly feeling desperately lost and hurt. The little house he had bought to begin his life with Vincent seemed terribly empty, and the small potted pine looked dejected and neglected. Cid drew a ragged gasp, fighting back his tears. It was Christmas Eve and Vincent was gone. Cid had no idea was hurt him more; that Vincent was gone, or that Vincent was roaming the snowy evening alone, slowly making his way back to the place where he had been murdered.

The phone rang. Cid walked quickly into the kitchen and snatched the receiver off the hook.

“Vincent?”

“No,” said Cloud. “Think blonder and with a heartbeat.”

“Cloud I can’t find Vincent, he’s gone.”

“He’s not gone, Cid. That’s what I was calling about. He’s down on the beach, watching the surf.”

Cid felt a surge of relief wash through himself. “Thanks Cloud.”

Cid hung up and grabbed his coat, running out of the house as he pulled it on. He ran down to the dark, snow-covered beach, pausing and looking around at the surreal scene. The snow was falling heavily, and all was silent save for the soft wash of the waves licking at the snowy sand. The sea was dark grey, as was the evening sky, and the only light was from a few houses resting above the breakwater.

“Vincent!”

No answer. Cid began making his way quickly down the beach to the area that Cloud would be able to see from his house, and breathed a sigh of relief as he spied a forlorn and solitary figure standing on the shore, looking across the water. Cid ran up to Vincent and threw his arms around him.

“There you are you silly shit! You had me worried sick!” Cid held the cold body closely, pressing his face into the partially frozen hair. He began to shake, and he didn’t even try to hide the tears that flowed. “I was afraid you were gone!”

“I’m sorry,” said Vincent softly. “I just needed to think.”

“About what?” Cid asked. He placed his hand on Vincent’s thin shoulders and pushed himself back so he could gaze into the red eyes. “Baby what’s the matter? Please, tell me.”

“I don’t know,” said Vincent. “I think I was just afraid. I started thinking about how the last time I loved someone…”

“You ended up being used as lab-rat by the woman you loved who was pregnant by the man who shot you,” said Cid.

Vincent nodded. “I haven’t dealt with any of it. I don’t know how. I don’t even know where to start. I’m broken inside, Cid. I don’t think I’ll ever mend.”

Cid drew him close, holding him against his chest once more. “You’ll mend. You just need to remember how to trust is all.”

“What if I don’t ever remember?”

“You’ll remember,” said Cid. “You just need to give yourself time to heal. You got me. I’ll help. Just don’t ever vanish on me like that again, do you hear me? I nearly came unglued.”

“I’m sorry Cid. I just… started looking at those ornaments, and the photos of those little children… and I was just overwhelmed by what I lost. The last Christmas I saw… I was in a tank, Lucrecia was seven months pregnant with Sephiroth… this holiday brought up so many bad memories, things I had tried so hard to forget.”

“So forget them,” said Cid softly, stroking his hair. “We’ll make new memories. Better ones. You’re not alone anymore. Okay?”

Vincent nodded, wrapping his arms around Cid. “Okay.” He drew a few steadying breaths, then glanced up at the sky. “It’s beautiful out here. I don’t think I’ve ever done this before.”

“You mean stand on the beach in a snowstorm?”

Vincent nodded, closing his eyes as he snuggled closer to Cid. “It’s pretty.”

“It is.” Cid held him tightly, gently rocking him in his arms. He happened to glimpse the house behind him, and saw a lean figure in the window that could only be Reno. As Cid watched, Reno opened the window, then threw something at them. It was a small object, and landed beside them on the snowy sand. It was a piece of mistletoe.

“Well look at that,” said Cid. “We’ve just been attacked by a stray piece of free-roaming plant matter. I better pick it up. Could be dangerous.”

“You’ll be sorry if that turns into a Molboro.”

“If it turns into a Molboro then Cloud needs to have a talk with Reno about where he is buying his Christmas supplies.” Cid picked up the bit of mistletoe, studying it. “Now what do you suppose he wants us to do with this? Any thoughts, Mr. Valentine?”

“Well,” said Vincent softly, “I have one idea. We could go home and play Santa Claus.”

“Oh yeah?” said Cid. “How do we play that?”

“We take the mistletoe home, hang it in the doorway, then I take my clothes off and you slide down my chimney. Then I pray that you come more than once a year.”

Cid raised an eyebrow. “I take it we’re feeling better.”

Vincent shook his head. “No. I’m frightened and confused and I can feel there is a piece of myself deep inside that is broken, and may never be repaired.” He turned his red eyes up to the snowy sky. “But I lost too much of myself hiding in a casket, only to emerge into a world I didn’t know.” He lowered his head to look at Cid, reaching up to touch his face. “I don’t know if I’m ever going to be right in my mind again, Cid. But… I’m tired of being ruled by the past. I’ve been hurt badly, but I don’t want to let it ruin what I could have with you.”

“Are you sure you want to be with me?” said Cid. “I hear I’m a bit of an asshole.”

Vincent kissed him. “And I’m a neurotic undead gunslinger. I think we’re perfect together.”

Cid grinned. “Yeah I think so too.” He ran his hand over the long wild black hair. “I love you Vincent. Everything is going to be fine from now on. I promise. Let’s go home.”

Vincent nodded. Together they walked down the beach, making their way to their modest little home. As they reached it, Vincent paused to gaze in wonder at the brightly coloured lights in the window. Within the small kitchen he could see a beautifully laid table, set with silver candles, and beyond that was the little potted tree, decorated with the antique ornaments from the boxes upstairs.

“Cid it’s beautiful!” said Vincent.

Cid stared in complete surprise. “Yeah… great. Now how did it get there?!”

Vincent turned his head to look at Cid. “You didn’t do it?”

“No!”

“Maybe Cloud and Reno did it.”

“How did Cloud and Reno cook a turkey in under an hour?”

“Fire materia?”

Cautiously they approached the little house, stepping inside to gaze in wonder at the transformation.

“Who did this?” asked Cid. “It can’t have been Cloud and Reno, they were watching us on the beach.”

“Tifa and Aeris maybe?” said Vincent.

“Maybe. But… in less than an hour?”

The pair stood within the little house, unaware of a strange collection on the porch, watching them. There was a rat in a pointy blue hat and long cape smoking a cigar, a rabid green parrot, a garden gnome, a pixie in a short skirt and death’s head wings, and last but not least a fairy with long black hair, large eyeglasses and a pink dress, brandishing a sparkly wand.

“Awwww…” said the pixie. “They’re so happy!”

“And confused,” said Rei the gnome.

“They’ll be even more confused when they find the two pairs of baby booties hanging from the tree,” said the Animama-Fairy, while the rabid parrot ripped splinters out of a post.

“Yeah what was up with that?” asked Rei.

The rat drew the cigar out of her mouth and slowly exhaled a cloud of bluish smoke.

“That’s a present that gets delivered next December.”