Super Mom

Rating: PG
Category: AU
Pairing(s): Cid/Vincent
Warnings: None
Summary: Cid tries to explain a few things to Benji and Aiden.
Notes: Illustrated by Animama

Cid was at his desk, pouring over some blueprints that were proving to be both difficult and annoying. He was chainsmoking worse than usual, and grumbling to himself as he sat in a carcinogenic haze when he became aware of two sets of little eyeballs peering at him from over his desk.

"What do you two yard-apes want?" he grumbled.

Benji cut to the chase. "Who's our mommy?"

Cid sighed. He knew sending the kids to school was a bad idea. He knew it was only a matter of time before questions came up. They should have just educated the kids at home like Vincent wanted to in the first place.

"You know who your mommy is," said Cid.

"No, our real mommy," said Benji.

Cid winced. "I'm talking about your real mommy."

"Well he can't be our mommy, he's a boy!" said Benji. "Bonnie Quaker said so."

"Bonnie Quaker is a twit."

"Teacher says the same thing," said Benji. "That two boys can't make a baby. And we're supposed to be making Mother's Day cards in class tomorrow so we want to know who to send them to."

Cid sighed heavily, putting down his pen and turning to his two small sons. "Look, that man out there is your mommy, and if you tell him he's not his heart is gonna break into five thousand pieces."

"So is Teacher lying?" asked Benji. Aiden, as usual, said nothing, just listening. Cid sighed once more.

"No, Teacher is not lying. But in this case, Teacher does not know everything. Your mommy is... special. He's not like anyone else in the world. He's been... changed... by a scientist."

Aiden perked up. "You mean like Wolverine?"

"Yeah... sorta like that..." said Cid. "Only... he can have babies now. I'm not sure Wolverine can do that."

"Having babies is a pretty retarded superpower, Dad," said Benji.

"Yeah I'd like to see Hugh Jackman yank a fourteen pound infant out of his ass and hope to walk again," muttered Cid. "Look, your mom... is not like any other mom on the planet. But believe me when I tell you that he is your mom. Okay?"

Benji was not convinced. "So... our mom is a boy... but he was changed by scientists into a kinda superhero... and now he can have babies."

"He can fly, too. And turn into things."

Benji and Aiden just stared at their father.

"He can," said Cid. "Ask him."

Benji just rolled his eyes and walked away. Aiden blinked large red eyes at his father, then proceeded to follow his brother out of the room. Cid continued to work, until roughly a half an hour later Vincent walked into the small office in the airship hangar.

"Cid?"

"Yeah, beautiful, what is it?"

"Is there any particular reason why the kids are asking me where the X-Men's hideout is and whether or not I can read their minds and control the weather?"

"Ask Bonnie Quaker," said Cid. "She started it."